If You Tickle Us...

You may be surprised to read what follows and you may be sure that I'm even more surprised to be writing it. Those who follow my tweets (do, they're pretty good) will know that, to put it mildly, I'm neither a fan of Pinter nor of the UOHC Rabbinate. But since the two are almost always on the same page I do not often have to make the invidious choice of who is the better looking or has the tidier beard. This time, however, after their very public falling out it is precisely this choice which falls to me and if needs must we might as well get on with it. The facts are pretty basic. Pinter expressed himself 'shocked' after the local MP Diane Abbott failed to oppose or even speak out during a debate on the local Labour party motion that the Labour party is not institutionally antisemitic. A pen pusher from her office then turned up at the UOHC Beth Din to complain about Pinter following which the UOHC Rabbinate approved the above letter. I have highlig...

Shabbos Parshath Tetzave… Went to the Skulener's tish simply to see the crowd. I also hoped I'd get to hear some nice singing. I left the house at 9.45pm and I turned up at Yesodey Hatorah School on Stamford Hill and the marquee was rather empty with few people at the top table. By the time I left after 11 the place was full to capacity. They had set up a marquee across the entire girls' primary school garden stretching from Hurstdene Gardens all the way to Northdene Gardens. There is the trunk of a dead tree in the centre of the garden which looked rather atristic in the middle of the marquee, its bare branches looking like a supplicant holding his hands up to heaven. Trust Chasidim not to see something like that and their concern must have been whether the tree may be touched on Shabbos or speculation if it's a fruit tree and so can't be cut down. As if it's a capital crime for a tree not to bear fruit. The Rebbe, who is a tiny little man with a cute smile...

What follows is Reb Tickle's 10-point plan for increasing vaccination in Chasidic communities: Have as senior a member of government as is available pay homage to Chasidic Rebbes, or Grand Rabbis, to request them to urge their followers to vaccinate their children. Ideally this should be the Secretary of State for Health in the respective countries provided it is not a woman. Not only would that make it impossible to show the meeting in frum papers, it would also be immensely disrespectful to report of a meeting between a Grand Rabbi and a woman. The meeting must be handled with great sensitivity so that each Chosid gets the impression that his Rebbe is the only one who truly matters in the corridors of power and that it is he who holds the keys to the health of the nation. Once one visit has taken place a suitable interval must pass before another visit is scheduled with the next Rebbe so that by the time of the second visit the first visit has faded from memory. A visit is n...

A TIME TO ACT- FOR THE SAKE OF THE SCHOOLCHILDREN As is well known to our esteemed public may they live, members of Chareidi communities throughout England, the future of the education of Jewish boys and girls to enable them to be educated on the path of the Patriarch Israel and in accordance with our ancient traditions passed down through the generations is in a dire situation . As that Elder, Jacob, peace be unto him, prepared [in time of crisis] with three strategies [appeasement with gifts, prayer and battle] so have we also followed in the footsteps of the sheep . We have held days of prayer and supplication in all our communities when young and old assembled to tear at the Gates of Heaven to revoke the evil decrees. Our efforts have certainly had an effect upon High and behold the Almighty God does not despise the prayers of the many. And we hereby beseech each individual to plead and increase their prayers before the Creator Blessed be His Name to revoke t...

It would be disrespectful to the good work of the Stamford Hill Hatzola organisation to cover their latest troubles in a mere few tweets, plus since this is a work-free week time is more in abundance. A full bodied blog must therefore be the order of the day. There is a dense fog surrounding Hatzola's latest saga with the main participants reluctant to 'get involved' (a favourite localism) whether out of a sense of loyalty, an unwillingness to further fan the flames or for fear of repercussions, which, given the allegations, may well be real. Our press is of course useless on anything that really matters and even then they'll spin the line they're told to or they know they are supposed to, so there's not much information to be gleaned from them either. However, this is not an excuse to desist from wading in and so if you're still here let's go. Established in the late 1970s or early 1980s, Hatzola is a voluntary organisation of medical first respond...

Moirai V’Raboisai! Here is my vort Lekovod Sukkos specially for my dear readers and followers. Why is it that on Pesach we pile on the stringencies while on Sukkos it is just the opposite and the leniencies win over? Let me give some examples. The Torah tells us to eat Matzoh on Pesach because our ancestors left Egypt in a hurry or because it is a slave’s ration and yet we spend a lifetime’s saving on some stale indigestible cardboard that supposedly complies with every stringency under the sun. That is also nothing compared to the ban on chometz. The Torah commands us to refrain from unleavened bread for just seven days which might be bad enough. But along come Chazal and add on about three-quarters of a day on Erev Pesach when chometz is also forbidden just in case. And it’s not just the duration of the ban but also the subject matter. Chometz means leavened dough but along came the rabbis and throw rice and millet into the bargain and of course the ashkenazim go even further and...

Wednesday ‘Vayelech’, Fast of Gedaliah… 5779 [12 September 2018] Denial on behalf of the Rabbonim A signed public rabbinical announcement was published on the eve of Rosh Hashono purportedly from the Rabbonim and Dayonim of our holy community have announced their support, intervened or have expressed a view in respect of one of the candidates in the English [British] Parliament. We hereby clarify that none of our rabbonim has signed the public announcement and that our principle remains as ever that we do not intervene or express any view in relation to general political affairs. There Rabbonim and Geonim will in future not express either verbally or in writing any view regarding political affairs. May it be the Will [of God] that no fault should result from us. Signed on behalf of the Beth Din [signature] Registrar There is something odd about this letter it being in Yiddish which is not used for public announcements of this type and extremely p...