If You Tickle Us...

1. Set up online account at www.eadmissions.org.uk . This applies to all applicants. If you are applying on a paper form then Hackney residents only should use the application form which can be download here . Residents of other boroughs must contact their home local authorities for an alternative paper form. 2. Complete the Supplementary Information form   and contact the UOHC for it to be signed by a member of the Rabbinate. 3. Complete the application form online or submit your paper application form to your local authority preferably by 25 October 2013 but by no means any later than 31 October 2013. A l ate application will put you at a severe disadvantage. 4. Submit the completed and signed Supplementary Information form to the School by no later than 31 October 2013. 5. Sit back and hope for the best. GOOD LUCK! CONTACT SHEET Yesodey Hatorah Senior Girls School Egerton Road, London N16 6UB Tel: 020 8826 5500 admin@yesodeyhatorah.org Schoo

Following the ruling of the new Carry On star Rabbi Mordechai Eisner on the Brookside eiruv some of our local finer minds have applied his halachic string-pulling closer to home and the map you see above is the result. Apparently, similar principles apply to both eiruvin and so an eiruv for the gander ought to be an eiruv for the *not tznius to mention*. Of course it being Golders Green they have an eiruv within an eiruv. Like the living rooms within their homes they have a mega super eiruv which they don’t use and is there only for show (and for carrying in hidden pockets) and then a smaller dingier eiruv where they can be themselves in their full glory. But surely if they can have two we poor cousins should deserve at least one. And if we’re going to start somewhere it might as well be south Tottenham where people will actually use it. Stick the eiruv in Fairholt Road and it will become a competition of not using it most. To be honest, Eiruvin has never been one of my strong p

So Golders Green can have sit-down restaurants and cafes, schools run by a board of governors rather than a single nepotistic strongman, mixed Tashlich sessions, decent mikvo’os and now even an eiruv and all with a Kedassia hechsher. But as for Stamford Hill it has been decreed that we are to remain forever under the servitude of a cabal of kleptomaniacs who can carry nothing but their own wallets. It’s not as if we in Stamford Hill are incompetent because in many respects we are far more capable than others. Reb Aaron of Satmar will this week lay the foundation stone and attend the opening of a shul, yeshiva and school, the other Satmar recently opened its own mega girl school, Belz has commenced a huge building project, Vizhnitz has in the last few years opened shuls and schools, ditto for Bobov and Ger. Yet in all this time the wretched UOHC has barely managed to refurbish a single mikve after many years as a building site and another mikve remains in a decrepit state after al

… and it’s kosher too though I hadn’t realised that Brookside had quite as many rabbis.